


green and blue (match your pictures)

by artificialmac



Series: Miss Vanjie and Other Phrases to Say While Walking Backwards [2]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Drabble Collection, Other, Self-Doubt, Self-Reflection, Vanessa-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-22
Updated: 2019-08-22
Packaged: 2020-09-23 21:56:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20347378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artificialmac/pseuds/artificialmac
Summary: Vanessa and Jose aren’t that different. Well... maybe a little.





	green and blue (match your pictures)

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I don't know what to say here.

Vanessa was passionate.

She had always had this spark in her.  
This need to be more than she was.

She portrayed a selfless image, a bad bitch with a heart of gold. (A heart that broke so easily.)

She was everything she portrayed to be. But she was also more than that.

She was more than a fragile shell of a person.   
She was more than a chapter in the book of her lovers.   
She was more than a catchphrase.

She wasn’t even a she.

Jose was patient. He was quiet and soft-spoken. He could get loud if he needed to, but he rarely needed to.

Growing up, he had been the shy kid in the back of the class.  
Growing up, he had been the kid bullied in the halls for his glasses.  
Growing up, he had been normal.

He did fairly well in school. 

Nothing extraordinary. 

A bit above average.

‘If he only applied himself’ his teachers would say.

‘If he pushed just a bit harder.’

He swears they say that about every kid.

Jose was on track to being a completely normal member of society. A nameless face in a thankless job in a small town.

He was on track to being a complete nobody.

He isn’t sure when the switch flipped. When Jose became Vanessa. When the drive to be more than his surroundings kicked in.

He isn’t sure when it started, he isn’t sure where it will end either. (Probably in a bar that smells like disappointment and air freshener)

He only knows that from that point on there was a clawing in his chest, a need to be something more. A longing to be greater than he was.

A hunger for anything and everything he could wrap his hands around.

So she jumped into the abyss of fame and money and love. She lived like she wouldn’t get the chance to. She ran and ran and ran so fast that she hardly recognized himself when she stopped.

So she didn’t stop long.

She kept on through drag race, through the fame, through the catchphrase, through drag race again, through Brock… 

through Brock, through Aiden, through Life.

She ran and ran and didn’t look back.

She was scared, sure, but it beat being alone.   
It beat being lost.

She was scared but she was alive.

She was free.


End file.
